Musings of a Dragonatrix

In light of the recent attack on Paris and the media response I have decided to finally get around to writing this article. I wanted to discuss what I observed during a "social experiment" during the Autumn Equinox, but I will be expanding into the social media response to the Parisian attacks since they are one in the same really. Around August I noticed that the Equinox, Eid, and Yom Kippur were going to land at the same time. Then I realized that a large portion, if not majority, of people were going to be praying/meditating at the same time. I felt this was going to be an opportune time to try to get us all to focus on one goal; peace and unity. I tried to speak with the authority of my Universalist ordination to get all in those groups to pray for all humanity to come together no matter of creed, for those who are starving, without family, without homes, those who are suffering, to try to join together to help stop conflicts and wars. People who believe in the power of ...

I've lived through my life without people apologizing to me or getting much closure for past events. I pretty much had built up enough ego around it that I felt that I did not need it. After a few events I found that I was wrong in that regard. I tried to find closure for myself through meditation and what people consider mindful acts. I decided that emotionally I was fine and that I did not need to hear "sorry" from any one who injured me in the past. I worked hard to heal myself on my own. I was successful; to a degree. I could live as a well adjusted adult and seem like I had not lived through the hell of being tortured despite carrying the scars. I did not harbor the active hate or resentment anymore. To a psychologist I would be considered cured. There always felt like there was something missing. A few years ago an ex had come back into my life and apologized to me for how my life went since he left me. He did something that became a common theme in my life, lef...

I would have loved you in every definition of the word. From the purest heart's love to the cosmic, spiritual, soul entwining love. You seemed different, you were not like the other men here; yet here we stand. Over the past seven months I've over looked 4 or 5 incidents that pointed towards you were scoping other women. I was upset but didn't make a deal because you didn't claim me. But after all of this marriage talk and monogamous promises I held you to a higher standard. Heathens may have different ethics and far fewer spiritual laws, but we have a strict adherence to oaths. For example I have a death pact with a dear friend of mine, we vowed to die in each other's presence (attend each other's assisted suicide or die fighting side by side) which is a more sacred vow than even marriage since it is the last act you will ever do. We don't take promises lightly. I made the promise of monogamy just as serious. Apparently you didn't since you joined a si...

As a child I was raised with the propaganda of family first. I would be expected to take care of children, make food for the family, take care of the home, etc.; but don't forget to get an education and get a job until you get the family. Needless to say I was thoroughly confused. Everything I wanted to do ended up with the answer "how are you going to provide for your future?" "You will not be able to leave that when you get married." or even "no man will want you if you do that." I had an IQ in the 190s (still testing 180 after brain damage from autoimmune encephalitis), was years ahead of my classmates, perfect marks in the advanced placement classes, perfect attendance in school; but here I was being trained that nothing I wanted was good enough because I had to take care of men. I was simultaneously told that if I did well I could get into college, but have these skills because you are woman therefore don't get too far in a career. I revolted...

Before people get pissed by this I'm not talking about those who are proud to be a mother or wife. I'm talking about those who completely have no identity without their men. It is one thing to take an interest in what your partner likes to show an interest in them, but another to identify as it and drop it as soon as they leave. Take my one friend for example. I've known her like 8 years. She is a well meaning near 50 yr old with a huge heart, some emotional issues, and an IQ of around 80 (basically my mom with bi polar). In this time frame she dated: - a white guy from Holland who was intelligent  (lvl 140, 42 pts lower than mine), computer programmer, 16 when they started cybering and 19 by the time they broke up, and gamer. She decides to learn coding, computer building, gaming, and dutch men were the best men on the planet. When he decided it was over because she cybered other dudes she was going to kill herself because he was the love of her life and one true love. ...

Need to revisit this in a few months to make it less ranty: The KKK vs IS image rant: There is a KKK vs the IS image making several passes around social media I'm sure all have seen it by now, a few times. I keep seeing the same string of arguments under it from various sources, they echo the argument I got into with former friends a few weeks ago, and I feel I must address them. I have let myself sit on it all week to calm down and see if I was still as miffed about the last exposure to the string of claims when I stopped being hormonal, and I am. So I will address what I have been seeing in a clinical matter. As usual this will come off as combative, but not to be taken as combative for the Christian friends who it does not pertain to (ie if you have been deemed ok, you are not the ones I'm bitching about). Claim #1- "The KKK is all but wiped out and the Muslim community is not crying out publicly against the IS." OK fine, the KKK is gone for the most part save ...

After a lifetime of torture leading to a series of highly traumatic events I felt myself shatter and split much like you see in the cartoons when the character runs into something. I remember hearing through out my life that I needed to under go a soul shattering, but never found a way to do it in a controlled way so I guess it was done for me in the most violent way possible. There is a process to do it so the person being unmade then remade does not have psychosis, then there was the way it happened for me where it completely takes your mind apart in the process. I had a period of time where I completely lost touch with reality. I would sit on the ground then not be able to trust if it actually was the ground and felt like I was going to fall. I could see my home plane and this world at once and react with both of them; I would duck from the jutting crystals when the path here was clear. I slipped into a serious suicidal fit during this so I would just go home and be done with it. Fi...